


Unrequited

by 94worms



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Discount sex work, M/M, Multi, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Sex Work, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-17 15:28:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18101282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/94worms/pseuds/94worms
Summary: This has quite the twist ending, I'll tell you that. To clarify, yes, they did break into Asra's shop to do this. Iohn takes his business very seriously.





	Unrequited

He's always acutely aware of his imperfections in front of Asra, regardless of circumstance. It's bad enough fully clothed, that way he knows Asra can't see his too-pale skin and too-weak frame. But his voice is too excitable, accent too noticable, one good eye not colorful enough to be noted. He's too loud, too rowdy, too MUCH, and yet not enough all at the same time. Asra never said it, but Julian knew it to be true.

Now, standing before Asra unclothed, everything was worse. He hated that Asra kept a mirror in his room, forcing him to look at himself. Too much, but not enough. He could see it in Asra's face, looking him over with a neutral expression. No part of his body sparked any kind of reaction in Asra as far as Julian could tell. Asra just stared.

Julian closed his eyes and tried to just get his boots off quickly, so he could minimize the time Asra had to change his mind about this whole situation. Act fast and he won't have time to be disgusted by you. By your worthless body, by your inadequacy. By your soul.

"Stand up." Asra commanded once his boots were off. "Hands behind your back." Julian complied immideatly. God, he's got it bad.

"Asra," he stutters, thinking over his words carefully. "Could we move the mirror?"

"No." Asra simply says. "Move away from the bed, and turn around. I'm going to tie your hands now." Julian did so reluctantly, facing the mirror on the wall. He tried not to look, but it was hard not to. He didn't blame Asra for not loving him, as he looked over himself in the mirror.

Too tall, too thin. Pathetically small dick, taking into account my height and state of being rock hard to the point of dripping precum on the floor. Vile. Gods, he probably thinks it's disgusting, even daring to present myself when I look like this is disrespectful.

"Someone's excited." Asra comments.

"Uhm, well, I- that is," Julian stumbled over his words, trying to find something to say. "That is to say..." Ugh, look at me, dripping when he says something so simple. I'm disgusting. Fucking disgusting, why am I still here...

"Ilya." Julian stops talking instantly with the mention of his name. "Stop talking. I don't want to hear your voice right now."

"Of course. Yes, I'll- sorry." Julian shuts his mouth this time. Idiot.

"Ah-ah, no, Ilya. Open your mouth." He tightens the ropes binding Julian's arms behind his back. "Good, good. Kneel down." Julian obeys without question, keeping his mouth open.

Ugh, I look awful from this angle. Asra deserves so much better.

Asra takes hold of his chin, tilting his face up so that it's at about crotch level when Asra sits on the bed. He puts his fingers into Julian's mouth.

"Suck."

"Yes..." He moans around the fingers.

"What did I say about talking?"

"...."

"That's better." Julian obediently sucks Asra's fingers, Asra forcing them farther and farther into Julian's mouth, invading him and making him gag. Asra takes his fingers out when he starts to feel like he'll really throw up if he gets choked one more time.

"hah..." Julian breathes, cock still incredibly hard and ready, however much he tried to prepare himself for the inevitable denial. I don't deserve to fuck Asra. I don't deserve it, I'm just so god damn lucky he's fallen low enough to consider me....

"Hey, hey, Ilya. Come back to me." Asra holds Julian's face in his hands to try and bring him back a little bit.

He's divine.....

"Ilya," Asra spreads his legs, now at face height with Julian with Asra sitting on the bed. "go ahead and have a taste."

Julian doesn't need to be told twice. He leans forward and presses his tongue to Asra's sex. Once he gets a taste, he's insatiable.

"Mmhn-!" He tries his absolute best to wriggle out of the bonds holding his hands behind him, but they hold strong. He leans into Asra, working his tongue over his clit and into his entrance, tracing over every part of him he can reach. Asra's hands pull at his hair, and he's only encouraged.

So fucking wet. For me. Fuck, how is he so wet for ME..?

"Ooh, fuck, Ilya... Seems like your mouth is good for something." Asra comments. "Keep going, that's it..."

And he does. Julian can't stop himself. He licks and sucks off Asra until the magician squirts, crying out when Julian just keeps going. Giddy from overstimulation, he pulls Julian's head back and catches his breath.

"A-Asra.... As-ra.... please..." Julian has cum on his face, and is making no move to wipe it off. He licks up what he can reach with his tongue.

"Please what?"

"Again, Asra, lemme do it again..." Asra seems a little shocked.

"What about you?" He motions to Julian's dick, long forgotten but still dripping. "Aren't you going to ask me to touch you?"

"Asra..." Julian tries to keep his voice steady "We both know you'd.... you'd never.. never stoop that low..."

Asra didn't know what to say. Up until now the arrangement had been unspoken.

"I never said that."

"But you meant it." Julian looked right at Asra, trying to gauge his facial expression. "...And I don't fault you for that, of course. It's understandable in every regard, I'm not exactly-"

"Ilya." Asra interrupts, and Julian closes his mouth obediently. "I never said that, I didn't mean that." He circled behind Julian and untied his hands, massaging his wrists.

"I don't.... understand...." Julian replied. "What could you possibly see in me that's worthy of love?"

"Ilya stop it." Asra sat down behind the taller man. "You're worthy of love."

Just not yours, the only love I'll ever want. Need.

"Sorry."

"No, it's me who should be apologising," Asra explains. "I shouldn't have left you to crash and burn after every time we.... do this. I didn't realize how much it hurt you."

Worse than any pain I've ever felt before.

"I'm alright." Julian says. "I'll go make you something to eat, if that's alright with you?"

"Ilya...."

"No?"

"Ilya, I'm sorry." Asra says. "Let me make it up to you." He kisses slowly down the petrified doctor's chest, lower and lower, until-

Warm, warm and wet. It's all he can feel, all he can percieve. Asra sucks him off so gently and so softly it's unreal. He restrains himself the best he can from moving his hips, but can't help the twitches and wiggling movements he makes when Asra's tongue touches just the right spot. Circles licked into his frenulum, special attention paid to the space right where the head and shaft of his dick meet, on the right side of his aching cock. How'd Asra even know about that spot being his favorite, anyway?

It doesn't matter right now.

The suction is perfect, Asra's tongue is skilled as all hell, and he gently nurses Julian's cock to the brink. It doesn't take long for Julian to spill, cumming hard down Asra's throat and whimpering pathetically. Seeing Asra like this, with his dick in his mouth, is too much for Julian. He starts to cry almost immideatly after he's cum. Asra cradles his cock in his mouth, sucking continually until Julian is crying audibly from overstimulation, embarrassment, and a thousand other emotions he can't place.

"How was that, Ilya?" He asks. "Are you alright?"

Julian sniffs in response, wiping his eyes and breathing deeply to calm himself down.

"It was..." He struggles to find words. "It was good. So good. I don't deserve to feel that, to feel that good."

"Shhh....." Asra cups his face in his hands, "It's okay." His face seems to shimmer in the candlelight, unnaturally so. "I love you."

The glamour falls right as Asra kisses him, the illusion of curly white hair and perfect caramel skin shatter into what they were before the spell. Julian keeps his eyes closed even though he can feel the figure kissing him shrink slightly in size, feel soft lips replaced with thin dry ones, smooth hands replaced with rough, scarred ones. He keeps his eyes closed even though the illusion is broken, he just wants to live in the moment where Asra had kissed him.

"Asra....."

"Ilya." Iohn's vision is framed by his ugly brown hair, which is tangled from the activities that transpired. "oh."

"..." They part quickly.

"Shit, I'm sorry. My concentration broke at the last second." Iohn explains. "Fuck, I feel bad now. Hey, how about I just let you off the hook for payment this time to make it up to you?"

"No, I couldn't ask for that. You did your best, you always outdo yourself to the uptmost extent for me, one mistake shouldn't cost you." Julian feels guilty, so fucking guilty. Asra is unreachable. But Iohn is not. He's talented with illusion magic, rivalling Asra himself in the field, and uses that... Well, mainly for crime, but sex work on the side. He's patient. He's willing to meet any request for a price, and Julian has absolutely no idea that Iohn longs for him just as much as he longs for Asra.

"Sorry, Julian, but I can't charge full price for a faulty product." Iohn jokes. "Five coins, maximum. It'd be theft otherwise. Plus, I barely stayed in character. Pathetic, if you ask me."

Julian hands him five coins, fishing them out of the pocket of his long-discarded coat.

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
